Maternal Sister

I have mentioned my little sister, Rissa, in different blogs that I have posted as well as on FaceBook. In a letter that I recently drafted, I referred to having to love "the idea" of my father, James Brown. And unfortunately, I have also been your brother in idea only, too. You and I are almost virtual strangers; however, for the most part, I have been OK with that b/c getting close to me can be a risk.

However, I worry that if Mom, Boo-Boo and Big Daddy were taken from us tomorrow, what would happen to us? You and I aren't close and neither are Eliase and I. I hadn't really given this dynamic much thought until you and my wife-equivalent encountered problems. Then I was put into the position to really analyze how I am to my family. I can apologize but how many times have I done that?

I am SO PROUD OF YOU, RISSA. You seem to have always the done the right thing and in my eyes, you can do no wrong. The reason I hold you in such high esteem is because of your accomplishments and how you impact the world around you, as well as the joy and pride you instill in the family. And unfortunately, in a lot of families, there is the one member of the family that is always into something troublesome, and I have been that from day one.

Boo-Boo, Big Daddy and Mom just accept me and love me in spite of me. My "wife" believes in me and I hope she stands by me, but my circumstances and I are just too much for you at times. I am sorry that this relationship has degenerated into a long-distant and emotionally-distant relationship. But I understand and I wanted to acknowledge that I know, at this time, that is the way it has to be. But always know that I love you dearly...