Fidelity

Does fidelity really exist anywhere? I've been a skeptic since I learned what the word meant. Fidelity, or lack thereof, has been part of my romantic entanglements. But I have to claim my part in this as well. Becasue of my childhood I have a difficult time trusting and believing people, and also I have huge "fear of abandonment" issues as well. I make it very clear very early in most of my relationships that my paranoia rules my perception and that I am more than eager to jump ship the moment I suspect I have been "done wrong", and move on without a second thought about working it out. So no, I am not very good at the game either...

Most of previous wives or significant others were not faithful, save one. Her name was Maria and she was faithful 'til I ran her off. She had no choice to leave because my lifestyle and behavior contributed to an environment that wasn't suitable for children.

I desire a monogamous relationship and true fidelity; I just want someone to call my own, a true soulmate and companion. I hope I have found that in Julie. She is all I need, but I have to say if we fail to prevail, then I always have someone immediately to which to run.